As I stood there remembering the goodness of God my spirit began to awaken and the desire to draw closer to Him grew stronger. I cried out asking Him to open my eyes and let me see His face. I so desperately wanted to experience His tangible presence, to gaze upon the face that looked upon me while I was in sin and stretched out His arms to die on a cross. I prayed for His presence to surround me like a cloud, pleading with Him to open the heavens and let me see a glimpse of His backside as He did for Moses. I longed to be like John and be carried by way of vision to the heavens to see the Lamb of God seated on the throne. I am a Son of God and I desperately wanted to look upon my daddy. "Open my eyes Lord", I prayed.
When I ran out of words I sat quietly with my eyes closed listening to the sounds in the air hoping to hear a still small voice call my name to look upon Him but nothing came. Doubt began to set in and I began to wonder if I wasn't living like I should. I've heard of people's eyes being opened to the heavens, why not mine? I thought over my life and the mistakes I have made and I wondered if there was anything that I hadn't confessed and repented of. "Surely there must be something wrong with my life" I thought or He would answer my prayer.
It's then that I turned and felt a warmth come over me defeating the coolness of the morning air. Though my eyes were closed I could tell that there was a great light in front of me. I felt a tingling in my body that caused me to believe something great was about to happen. Could this be the moment that I see his face? Could it be that my prayers have reached heaven and moved God's heart? With great expectations I opened my eyes to see His face and I did but not in the way I expected.
In front of me was a huge sunrise in a clear blue sky with light reflecting off of the water in a beautiful display of sparkles and colors. It's then that I realized God gives us a "good morning kiss" every day in the form of a sunrise and every night His face kisses us "goodnight" with a sunset. God is the light of the world. The reason the sun burns so bright and provides so much warmth even though it is 150 million miles away from the earth is because God allowed part of His presence to fuel it's fire. Since God is everywhere at all times the sun is able to warm us with God's presence from so far away.
So looking back now I realize how silly it was for me to pray to see God's face. God is spirit. Our minds are so finite that we can't comprehend being able to "see" something unless it has substance. We think of "seeing" as setting our eyes upon it and then the image bouncing around in our head until it reaches the brain where it causes us to comprehend the image. That is why we go through life missing God's face. We are looking for Him the wrong way, we are looking physically and we need to look spiritually.
I don't want miss God's face because I'm looking for a sub-par human version of Him. I want to look around me and see Him in everything.
A slave no more, except to Him who saved me!
Lee Lumley
Romans 6:6
'"Knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin. FOR HE WHO HAS DIED HAS BEEN FREED FROM SIN"
